Significance...

can be found in the oddest places. A glance, a phrase, a song, a flashback, an encounter with a familiar stranger. Moment to moment we live life, taking small things for granted. Miniscus for example, or the perfect raindrops just before the pour sets in. Small things that we were once too preoccupied to notice are the exact things that make the grey fade into shimmering bliss. My significance is lost and found through different shades of heartbreak because everything is more beautiful when your world falls apart and is suddenly put back together again.

A lady...

came into the petstore where I work and started ranting about how pet stores are evil, so I responded by saying, "Yes I hate puppies. I try to kick at least 10 a day."

I once...

thought of writing a book about my life. The titles I considered were, "Shhh!", "Shattered Glass", and "Escape from Innocence". I then decided that everyone has their own sad story and the truth only bores people. I'd much rather teach people about things other than how to not fall apart.

"Why, Why, Why?"

He asked me repeatedly. As if the truth would give him a little insight. Truth. I never tell the truth...at least not all of it. It ruins my illusion of being an enigma and besides there is always too much to tell. The truth, the real, secret truth of why I play that role is because somewhere deep down inside I'm a sadist. I love to see them in pain, watch the squirm. It's like every "no" I utter is slowly killing them and I thrive on every last one. So, there you have it. The Why's are resolved.

I wish...

I lived in a safer place so that I could go out at night and find deserted playgrounds, train tracks, and lots for me and my Great dane to play in.

I also wish someone loved me back. Lame, don't I know it.

I'm going to the Met in New York...

while I'm there on vacation. There aren't any operas playing in July, just Ballet. Ten bucks says I still cry my eyes out like a silly girl who has achieved her life-long dream. I love my life.

You know...

things have maybe gotten out of hand when you cut someone's shirt off with a knife. Damn I'm fucking crazy sometimes.

I Crossed the Line...

My friend and I got into an I'm gonna kill you joke fight yesterday. Here are some of the things that were said by me:

1.) I'll gouge out your eyes with ice picks and feed the remains to a murder.
2.) I'll stab you all over with forks and laugh as your blood sprays in different directions.
3.) I'll slit your throat and fuck the wound with a strap on.

*I am such a goth kid sometimes.

It's Almost Startling...

to be kissed and just kissed for the sake of kissing. Not because someone wants to fuck you. Not necessarily because you're beautiful or full of unconventional beauty, but just because. It made my heart flutter. I haven't fluttered in almost a year, and the last time I was sure I was dreaming. I still think I might have been.